Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Mommy's Angels

I have started reading the book Heaven is For Real and it has me really thinking about a lot of stuff. Last year around the begininng of February mommy believes she met her angels.

"All God's angels come to us disguised."

I've been wanting to post about this experience but didn't know when it would be the right time. I think about it all the time but after I started reading this book i keep thinking about it more. This book is so inspirational and makes me so happy that I have let God come into my heart. But the beginning of last year I was starting to lose faith. I don't know why I was, just questioning myself more. I didn't feel like the same person and wasn't sure what to believe anymore.

I wish I was blogging when this happened so I could remember the actual date but I really can't remember. I know it was the beginning of February. Like I said, I was going through this phase where I didn't know what to believe. I was cleaning one afternoon and just knelt down by my bed and prayed. I prayed for God to be there for me, told him I needed him. I cried and prayed for five minutes. After I was done praying, I stood up and said to myself, "That was really weird". I've never been the type to kneel down and pray. I hardly ever pray. I wiped all my tears off my face and continued cleaning and pretty much forgot about what had just happened.

That week I missed my mom SO much. I even asked her to come spend the night with me just so I could see her for a night. But she never did. I was working at Cracker Barrell late one eveing and we were closing in 15 minutes. I was the only server because we were pretty dead that evening and I hadn't had a table in almost an hour. 15 minutes before we closed this couple came in. They walked in and sat in my section. They were so beautiful, both of them. They walked in and were smiling so big at me. At the time, I thought "Man, these people must know me or are really weird." I went to their table and greeted them with my name and asked what I could get them to drink. I never would have expected what they said next.

The woman says "We know who you are Josie. We didn't come to eat, we came to talk to you. Do you know why we're here? God sent us to you. We aren't even from around here."

I got chills when she said this. If it wasn't for me praying out of no where earlier that week then I would have just thought these people were coming from a church to talk to me or recruit me. We always had people coming into work leaving us their church cards or asking us about our religion and faith. But I knew these people weren't just coming to do that.

I freaked out and told them I'd bring them water and biscuits. I was shaking when I went back there to get them. I came back out and they were just sitting there, so happy and beautiful. They were starring at me as if they had been looking for me forever and finally found me. When I came back I felt comfortable and calm. I wasn't scared. 

"Angels may not come when you call them, but they'll always be there when you need them."

I gave them their drinks and they started talking to me. They both talked about how they aren't from around here and drove hours to talk to me. That I was special to God and I needed to let him in. They just kept talking about how special I was and how he's been telling them to come to me. They said they were so greatful to finally meet me. "We are so happy to meet the person who God tells us is so special."

I know that this may sound very creepy, but at the time it was so comforting. I was happy talking with them. I just listened. I didn't say anything at all. They talked to me about how I needed to just trust God. "Your sister is very special too" How did they know I had a sister? "God wants you to use your voice." My major is Broadcast Journalism, where your voice is everything.

After they said that everything felt so real. They talked to me for about 10 minutes. They said "We've come here to do what we needed to do." and got up to leave. I didn't know what to say. I just said thank you and watched them leave. The women came back and said, "I know you miss your mom a lot, so here's a mom hug for you." We hugged and they left.

"Angels frequently show us their love by some sort of sign, sometimes a touch. It is impossible to miss it when an angel touches you."

I went into my managers office and just cried and cried. I told her what had happened and she just smiled and said "Josie, you have met your angels." When they were there I never saw it that way. But replaying what had just happened & how beautiful this couple was all made sense. If they hadn't known all that about me, trust me I would have thought they were the creepiest people in the world. But I didn't feel that way.

That night I had the weirdest dream. I had a dream that my cousin & my  roommate (who had just lost her grandma) and I were moving into a new apartment and there were crosses everywhere. I mean everywhere! Huge crossses too. I woke up in the middle of the night scared and caught myself just starring at the cross I have hanging in my room. I started to freak out. I texted my roommate and she said she was freaking out because she  thought she had saw her grandma. I lost it. I called my mom crying and crying telling her I was scared and that something was going on with me. I told her everything that happened and she told me to talk to one of her friends.

The next day I talked to her friend, Annette Lewis, about everything that happened. She had the same expierence years ago when she was young. She told me to be thankful and happy that God loves me so much to reach out to me when I needed him. That he wanted me to believe in him & he's always there. She told me he sent this couple to make me believe again. To have faith and to trust him.

"When angels sense you need them, and angels always do; they come unseen from everywhere to help and comfort you."

She was right. I wasn't afraid anymore and I had no more questions. I was happy and knew God was there and he had listened to my prayer as I took the time to listen to My Angels.

God speaks to those who take time to listen, and He listens to those who take time to pray.

I had def. changed and believed so much more in God. A month and a half later I found out I was pregnant. My pregnancy wasn't planned so I was scared and didn't know what to do. I was upset and asked God, "Why? Why now, I'm not ready. This isn't how I planned it." But after feeling my baby kick for the first time I knew that this "accident" wasn't an accident. My baby was sent to me for a reason and God wanted me to become a mother. A mother to my little miracle.

"An angel is someone who helps you believe in miracles again"

Today, I believe that these angels came to me to remind me that God is there.They wanted me to believe in him so I could be blessed with my perfect baby girl. That through everything I went through, good & bad, that he was there and I was doing the right thing. I haven't seen or heard from them since but I know I'll see them again someday. . Things were hard, but I kept telling myself this:

"If God brings you to it, he'll bring you through it"

It helped me get through and it showed me how strong of a person I am and how strong God's love for me is. He has been very good to me and I couldn't thank him enough for everything I have in my life.

Sophia, I can't wait for you to learn everything about God & love the person who made you and sent you to me!

"When you are lonely, empty and afraid, remember this: An angel who loves and cares for you is somewhere looking for the medicine you need. Look for the medicine messages your angel sends you in its a rainbow, a dew-sparkling spider web, a falling feather or snowflake, or a stranger's smile."

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