Monday, March 28, 2011

back at school

Finally have time to write to you again! I'm now back at school until Thursday :( I didn't want to leave this morning. I had to leave SO early too. You were still sleeping when I left. So I didn't get to play with you or see you before I left. I hope you don't wake up looking for me. I'll be back on Thursday. I hope that those days go fast for you and that you don't miss me too much. I don't ever want you to feel like I'm not coming back. I know you won't remember but I don't want you sad. Just remember, a few more weeks & I won't be leaving you anymore! I have a countdown -- 48 days until I graduate!!! I took this picture of you before I left. I always take a picture of you right before I leave and then I kiss you like crazy. You didn't even wake up when I kissed you.

Uh I miss you already. Spring Break went by way too fast! We ended up leaving your daddy's early. We were supposed to stay until Saturday but we left Friday afternoon. I couldn't stay there any longer and your daddy was going to be gone most of the day. We sat in that room ALL week and I could tell you were getting bored. So was I. I didn't want to leave at all but I wanted to be back where all your things were instead of staying in your daddy's room. He teared up when he said bye to you. It was so sad. You were sleeping when he said bye. I hate that he only see you a few times a month. He has been so busy with baseball that he hasn't had time. Just know that he's only doing it because he has to. He didn't even want to play this year, but with his scholarship he has to. I felt so bad taking you from him. But he understood and said it was prob best too. Driving home I thought about your daddy the whole way. He has gone through so much in his life, and has turned out to be such a good hearted man. And he's come such a long way and he's done it all himself!! I am so proud of him! I know that I'm doing the same things as him but I was spoiled my whole life. I got everything I wanted. Everything was easy for me! & still is. But your daddy lost his father (your grandpa Gary) when he was 6 and his mother (your grandma Carmen) was devastated and wasn't the same for years. So growing up Gary didn't have his parents. He took care of himself, and still does. This has made him the strong person he is today. I know that being your father is the most important thing in his life. He wants you to have what he never had, and so much more. I love watching the two of you! The way he looks at you and smiles is so beautiful. & you love everything he does. You watch him all the time and just smile! I can't wait to be a family together. I know we already are but I just want to have our house, be together every day, every night.. it's going to be so much fun. I get so excited just thinking about being done in May and starting it all! Your daddy and I have always had a long distant relationship so I'm VERY excited to spend all our time with him too. He lived with me this summer while I was pregnant with you and he took such good care of me. He always does. He cooked for me while we stayed with him this week :)  I know we went there to visit your daddy but it felt like it was just the two of us the whole week because he was so busy. You were very cranky but I still had a good week with you. We were so lazy, I wore sweats all week.
We headed to Parkersburg after saying bye to your daddy. I get so sad just thinking about when we left. I NEVER see your daddy cry. He says he wasn't cry, just tearing up. But he was crying. It hurt me to see it. I wish we could just go there all the time. You slept the whole way home. And you were so happy to see your grandparents. I can tell you love them very much. You were in such a good mood when we got there. I think you were happy to be "home". Your there everyday and all your toys are there. There's more to look at. I know I blamed your crankyness on teething. But I think boredom may have been another factor. But you just smiled and smiled as soon as we got back.
We didn't do too much this weekend. Saturday we just laid around. I went to the store with your grandma while you stayed at home with your grandpa. That evening your grandparents went to a party and Stephanie came over with Tuck Everlasting and Due Date. You fell asleep around 10 and slept while we watched the movies. You sleep so funny sometimes. We just kept laughing at you because you sleep just like your daddy, with your mouth open. And you'll smile every once in a while. I always wonder what your dreaming of.

Look at you sleeping with your mouth open! Steph left after the movies and we went upstairs to bed. It snowed that night! Actually stuck on the ground. The weather is so crazy. I'm just ready for warm weather and this summer. We are going to have so much fun. I want to put you in swimming lessons. You are so happy during bath time. So relaxed. I feel like you would LOVE swimming. And I really hope you like the beach! We'll try and go a few times this summer. I'm excited to get you some lil bikinis. Mommy is finally happy with her body again and will wear a bikini too! I told myself after having you that I would probably never wear a bikini again. Now I can't wait! The next we woke up and spent the day at the mall and kohls. I love to shop, its so addicting. Your grandma does too. Hopefully you won't become addicted to it! You were sooo good! We were going from 12-6 and you just sat in your stroller and looked around. Everyone wanted to talk to you, and you just smiled and "talked" back. You love when other people talk to you! You looked so pretty too. You had on your cheetah print outfit with fur on it that your great grandma Celi got you! & of course a bow!

After the mall we came home and I went to dinner with Stephanie while you stayed with your grandparents. I came home and we played and you fell asleep. I was sad. I knew it was my last night with you for a few days. While you slept I did my homework and went to sleep to. You didn't even wake up! I woke up at 5:30 to get my stuff ready and packed up and left at 6. I missed you as soon as I walked out the door. I know it's only 4 days away from each other but I swear you get bigger in those days. I remember one day I got to Parkersburg and went to the daycare to get you and one of the workers was holding you and I looked at her and said, "Is that Sophia?" I couldn't believe that I had to ask if that was you! It's crazy how fast your growing. I'm so excited but so sad too. You are going to be so beautiful. I look at you and can't believe how perfect you are! Beautiful brown eyes, with a beautiful complexion. Your eyelashes are so long!! & your little smile is adorable! It all just makes a perfect lil you!! & I am so thankful to call you mine. ALL mine :) Ok so I can keep writing all day so I'm going quit now. I'll try and update the rest of the week but it will be mostly about what I've been up to. But I'll write to you soon. Hope your having a good day! I love you!

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